I am listening to the sound of the rain on the roof. It isn't a heavy rain that pounds on the roof and leaves you wondering if it will pour into the house and assist with the spring cleaning. It is a "just enough" rain so that the soothing, cleansing sound can be heard over the clicking of the keypad. I watched amazing cloud formations today - the precursors of this storm. I am fascinated by clouds (always have been). I watch them form and move and change with such a fluid grace - adapting and responding and then continuing on their merry cloud way.
If only I could be more like the clouds (in the graceful, adapting and responding way)! Again today I knew I had hit my limit after I had passed it by five miles. I sat at my desk and realized that I didn't have any energy left to get to my car and drive home (ooops). So I sat and watched the tree and the clouds, and then went down to my car and sat for awhile, watching more clouds and the odd squirrel who was busy enjoying the gifts of spring. Then home to rest, but frustrated by the experience! Time to take the speed down another notch - but what operates at the speed between turtle and rock? Augh!
Changes - adjustments - fine tuning - disappointment - adjustment - more fine tuning - more disappointment - adjustment - glimmer of hope - deep breath - adjustment - miscue - changes - more adjustments - looking for the glimmer of hope - having faith that the hope will come - breathing deeply - resting in faith...
There are times in life when all one can do is keep riding the wave of change, while holding on for dear life!
It isn't the most enjoyable ride in the park, but it has unexpected perks. When I remember to stay focused on observing God's movement on this ride, I am not disappointed. God continues to bring grace into my life in the most unexpected ways - the kindness of people, a squirrel ballet, the subtle shift of colors in the sky, enough energy to get from my desk to my car (and that miracle was right up there with the parting of the Red Sea), and the willingness to stay with this phase of the journey to see where it leads.
I would like to tell you that you will never find yourself on this particular ride, but a lie is not right speech. Life has these times, and thank goodness they are not forever. When you find yourself on the "White Knuckle Change Express" hanging on for dear life, look for God in the midst of the experience. You will not be disappointed.
What then is the speed of rock? Well, I guess it depends on what kind of rock we're discussing. The ancient rock along the fault line that runs near Borah Peak moves very slowly - but is moving nonetheless. Sand on a beach at the coast travels much more quickly. It is swept into the water and then sun bathes on the beach. Sometime it plays with the children, provides a home for all manner of life, and molds itself to its environment. Sand is very active rock - experienced rock - wise rock, possessing a perspective that the wise old grandparents making up the mountains of the West do not share. Two different kinds of wisdom - both possessing great value. And sometimes (but not always) the sand can remember when it made its journey from the mountains to the sea, from slow time to dancing in the water to living at the junction of land and sea.
Tonight my mind will dance like sand, while my body moves slowly like the ancient rocks in Custer County. This time will not not last forever, and perhaps I will gain some wisdom and new perspective through this experience - that is the beauty and blessing of change.
Blessings,
Kim
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