Liquid Time

Right now there is a break in today's storms.  As I look out at the Boise Foothills, they appear to be frosted with a bright coating of snow.  Rain, sleet and hail have been the options playing outside my window today.  Each brings a different percussive presence to my window - the varying rhythms have been most entertaining (easy to say from the warmth of inside the house).  It is cold enough to be unpleasant (nothing is worse than cold rain/sleet to chill the body to the bone), but not cold enough down here for snow.  That may change by tomorrow morning, just in time for the drive to church.  I would say that the state of precipitation is fluid, but perhaps that pun is best left alone...

Time also feels quite fluid/liquid today.  Over ten years ago to the month I saw (in my heart) a design for a tapestry.  It was as clear as day, but each time I tried to sketch it, the image would evaporate! Over the years I have tried (in vain) to sketch it again, and each time I do, the image (which evolves with each passing year), evaporates.  I even went so far as to warp the big tapestry loom for this project (the dimensions stay stable over time even when the image changes),  but each attempt to weave the tapestry was met with - a wall.  Every attempt to push through this block was met with failure.

Finally I had to accept that it was not the time to weave the tapestry.

Several weeks ago part of the image for the tapestry evolved yet again - but this time, I had a strong sense that THIS was the image for the tapestry.  Next came the colors...finally, the design - which shares some similarities with the original design, but has evolved in some interesting ways.

Now it is time to weave the tapestry.

In the past, when I could not even begin the design, I felt feelings of failure and inadequacy.  Now I see that it was simply not time to begin.  There were experiences I needed to have - questions I needed to ask - joys/sorrows that needed to be experienced before I could begin.  And now, out of the depths of my experience, the image emerges...

...in its own time.  When the time is right.  In the fullness of time.  Not necessarily when I want/need it to happen - but in its own time.

In some ways, the evolving image has been a mirror for work taking place in my soul.  It has also been a powerful guide/teacher, leading me ever deeper into awareness of God's presence in my life...

...just in time.  In time.  Time -

Can I allow myself to accept that things emerge/resolve in their time (exit failure and inadequacy) and sing the song of Ecclesiastes?

Singing (tentatively),
Kim